For the better part of a decade, I have said that I have the opposite of a Green Thumb. That I, in fact, have a Black Thumb. And not just any black thumb, I have the Black Thumb of Death.

I have tried multiple times over the last several years to keep plants alive. Many friends have offered their advice:

Get and Ivy, they said. Those are impossible to kill, they said. Well. It died.

Get a cactus, they said. Those can certainly stay alive, they said. Well. Those died too.

Numerous other plants have died under my “care.” The last time I tried to count I stopped because it was too depressing. Flowers, dead. Cacti, dead. Those plants that live in water? Also dead.

BUT I am determined to turn a corner.

I have kept alive a Lucky Bamboo (that I have recently learned are not actually bamboos) for over TWO YEARS! Clearly, that means that I am now ready to be a gardener.